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Blue eyes large and luminous in the dark and- No these are hazel- Hazel and scared to death. Tristan was scared to death. Not scared of dying, no. Not scared of that, had never been scared of that. Scared of what life was going to be like for the one he was leaving behind. Scared of the weakness, the lack of control that he had now, weak and weaker and hating every second of it. A fighting body that could battle with everything but itself. Not his fault, never his fault. Hate the disease, don't hate him. Why does everything I touch- Blue Eyes and Tristan. I never named it, As though that were all the more reason to live in this guilt. Tristan asked for wings on his stone. Asked for a dragon. A dragon on the edge, curled and crouched around the corner, guarding, watching, protecting what Seto couldn't protect in life. When asked why in tones that neared betrayal, Tristan only smiled and touched, and wouldn't answer, the way he always did. He got his way, always got his way, never could deny him anything. Weeks later, in the dark, Blue eyes in the dark, hazel eyes in the dark, scared to death, Blue Eyes were you scared? Hard breaths escaping in the humid dark, But no tears, never any tears, no time. Standing, leaning against the granite in one night, one last hour of weakness before he went on, because that was what he always did and could do no less and no more and that was what Tristan asked anyway and he always got his way. He touched the dragon. It was warm. It wasn't just a dragon, Seto understood now. It was Blue Eyes and- So he would never feel torn. Blue Eyes and Tristan were here. "This isn't fair," Tristan said quietly, on his knees at the edge of existence. :Life is rarely within our personal parameters of 'fair,' Tristan,: Said Blue Eyes, looming up large and gentle and impossible at his side. They were waiting, waiting for Seto, would not change until he joined them and the three of them could go on. :We are always finding something unfair.: "He needs me," Tristan argued. He was only allowed inner pain. His voice should have been hoarse from screaming, fists raw from pummeling the barriers. No pain. Only exhaustion and the horrible ache of separation. That, he decided with sadistic satisfaction, was one thing they could not take from him, and so he stubbornly held onto it. They couldn't take away his grief. :He has not lost you.: Tormented hazel eyes swung back, gazing over the edge. :It was time.: "That's bullshit." The long, sinuous neck turned in Tristan's direction, large blue eyes looking at him with gentle reproach. Tristan set his jaw and returned the dragon's gaze. :You cannot be apart forever. You will not be whole. One way or another, as in this life, as in the one before it, you will find one another.: Great wings spread, a brilliant white-blue canopy overhead, :What is one lifetime's suffering, when in the next there will always be joy? You have eternity to find joy.: "It doesn't help right now," Tristan snapped, and then, realizing how petulant he sounded, his entire frame drooped in momentary defeat. The supporting body of Blue Eyes ghosted up beside him, strangely warm in spite of the rustling body plates that shifted endlessly like feathers, and he was lost. Tristan's cheek touched the warmth of the dragon's neck and a bright wing closed loosely over him. :We will wait?: Blue Eyes inquired. "…If I have to," Tristan sighed. :If it helps,: the dragon offered, after a time, :I, too, continued to hold my grief. But there is one other thing that cannot be taken from you.: Tristan closed his eyes, so tired, shutting out the harsh reality for one glowing second, and felt the sadness ease. He didn't need Blue Eyes to spell it out, he knew it already. "Love," they said at once. :Let it be only that when he comes.: The great, moon-white head swung back, curling in upon itself like a swan, and softly the warmth of the dragon's nose brushed Tristan's forehead. :He would not like to see us grieving for him. I think…: a deep rumble drifted from the dragon's chest, :I think he would not understand why.: "You should have seen the way he'd look at me when I told him I missed him," Tristan said with a phantom smile, and lay one broad hand on the white armored nose. :I have,: Blue Eyes replied gravely. The great blue eyes were warm with understanding. To the Ending >> Back to Scylla's Work E-mail the Author Home |
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